[Note from 2017: This is part of a series of posts I wrote after suddenly discovering that religion can be questioned. I felt like I had broken into uncharted territories of thought and needed to reveal the way to the sad unenlightened. Drunk on this conviction, and still emotionally underdeveloped following a very introverted childhood, I proceeded to become the most condescending kind of atheist and also blindly wreak emotional havoc among the Christian parts of my family. Thankfully this was a phase. My current thoughts on religion are quite different, and at some point if I see fit to blog about them, you’ll be able to find them in the “religion” category here. I’m leaving the posts up as a window into that ugly time.]
Mom’s going through a nervous breakdown. She revealed to me this morning that she hadn’t eaten for three days. I made her one of her microwave Jenny Craig things, and she ate about half of it. She’s been crying all day long. She’s really at a low spot; I’ve never seen her like this before. This wasn’t supposed to happen. If I’d known – if I’d even suspected – I would never have done it like this. Pray for her, if you will. Dad’s taking her to Christ Hospital to get an IV, so she’ll have some nutrients in her. She says she’ll probably call off work tomorrow. I really hope she gets better, and in a hurry. I can’t stand to see her like this. Especially knowing that I started it all.
What have I done.
[2017 again: She came back from the hospital later that night and soon started eating again, and eventually was able to accept things the way they turned out to be, with some help from the Quakers. I took far longer to get a clue.]